My mother just left on a Carribean cruise for 9 days. l am 27 but l live with her & it has been a long time since we've been apart that long. If my life was not so messed up & if l did not suffer from BPD (Borderline) it would not be so bad. She just left 10 minutes or less ago &l can barely type out this question or plea for help. l can not call local crisis lines b/c they're NOT helpful at all. l miss my mother already. She deserves this cruise no doubt. Lastly l worry about things like the ship being attacked by pirates, storms in the Carribean, or some1 putting something in my mom is drink. l take medication but it only does so much for me.

*Do not ask why l had to move in with my mom27 & believe me l plan to get my own house (again) asap!*
Well Anxiety IS part of my disorder.
Other than my BF and a small circle & l do mean small l do not have many friends.
l live in a condo. Some 1 else rakes our yard lol.
no Sarge l do not have any sibs or l would not be here of all places. l do not see a therapist right now b/c of money. The low cost ones do not even know what BPD even is!

Do not worry ! It is only 9 days. You're 27, u can handle that. Take a deep breath, put some music on, have a bubble bath or something.. read something funny, whatever. Sounds like u r way too focused on ur own high anxiety.

edit: distract yourself! it is the best way to deal with anxiety :) go out with ur boyfriend & small circle as much as u can. nothing will happen to ur mom, l am sure she will be more than fine, besides it was her decision to go, was not it? u can not spend ur life in fear. try to enjoy these 9 days :)

try going out with someof ur friends and get urself busy with other things

call ur mom, tell her that u are worried about her but dont let her come home. let her enjoy it. when she gets back u will be all the more grateful. call some friends and go out to get ur mind off of it. think of how much fun she will have. im sure she will be fine. start something that will take ur mind off of it. (clean the house, make cookies, take a shower, watch tv, go on a walk, go out with friends, go to a movie, rake the yard, shop online) etc. good luck.

Just take a deep breath. Take a walk or watch something funny on TV. Do something to get your mind off it. Do something for yourself. Go shopping go out to eat with a friend. Just do something else to get your mind off of it.

Good luck.

l am sorry that you're going through so much. Andi cant give you a prefect answer. l can tell you however that there is a low risk of anything happening on the cruise that could go wrong. l understand missing your mom. mine just left about an hour ago for the week and l miss her too. Just try doing something else. read a book, or call a friend. Do not think about the bad things that could happen, try to think about how much fun shes going to have.

call your mom, she is going to be okay. just keep telling yourself that. nothing bad is going to happen and you are going to be alright. deep breaths.

1 l do not think pirats exsist anymore and when l was young l went to camp for a week and l missed my mom too and my mom missed me but u know what after camp l realzied what a fun time l had and i'm sure she is having a fun time to so try to stop crying.

Tips to Deal With Anxiety & Worry
Everyone worries at some time or another. It becomes a real problem when it encompasses ur very existence. When all u can think about is the next bad thing that is going to happen. Your nerves r constantly on edge, u r always tired, emotionally & physically drained, & very irritable. Getting up & going in the morning seems like trying to scale Mt.Everest. There r natural ways that can help u break the ties of constant worry & anxiety.

1. You must learn that there is no way to predict everything that is gonna happen. The world is an uncertain place on the best days. On the worst, it is total chaos. When u worry, it makes u feel safer. You think that it will prepare u for all the bad things that will happen. The truth is, all u r doing is making the situation much worse, & not enjoying any of the good times in life, for fear of the bad ones. You have to change ur way of thinking. Instead of worrying about what might happen, ask yourself how likely it is that something good can happen. There is just as much likelihood of a good or neutral outcome. The more positive u are, the more positive things will be drawn to you.

2. Learn how to give worry it is own time period in ur life- There is no way to banish worry from ur life completely. There is a way however to make it is toll on ur time more manageable. Take an hour out of each day as ur worry time. This is the time that u r free to think, & to think about worrying. The rest of the day is off limits. Try to make this time well before bedtime, as not to let worry intrude on ur sleep. If u have a worrisome thought during the day, write it down for ur time to worry. Do not spend anymore time on it than that. Worrying only during ur worry period will give u greater control over ur life.

3. Stop ur negative thoughts in their tracks- If u suffer from constant worry & anxiety, ur attitude is probably very pessimistic. You may feel as if u could not handle life if something bad were to happen. You probably jump to worst-case scenarios all the time, & think that u r a magnet to tragedy. These irrational, negative thoughts r called cognitive distortions. Although they r not based on reality, they r very hard to stop. It becomes automatic thinking that u must retrain ur brain in order to squash it. You must learn to examine & challenge ur worries & fears. Instead of thinking of them as facts, view them as theories u r testing out.

4. Ask yourself some questions that address the worry u feel-

1. What proof do l have that the thought l have is true? That it is untrue?

2. Is this thought helpful? Could this thought potentially hurt me?

3.What r the chances that what l am afraid will happen will in any real likelihood happen?

4. If the probability of it happening is low, what might be a more likely outcome?

5. There r several types of cognitive distortions that lead to anxiety & worry:

1. All -or-nothing attitude - Looking at things in black & white, when quite often there
are many shades of gray.

2. Overpersonalization- Taking blame for things that u have no control over.

3. Jumping to conclusions- Making bad interpretations without any evidence.

4. Diminish the positive- Explaining away positive events as if they do not count.

5. Emotional reasoning- When u believe the way u feel is grounded in reality.

6. Catastrophizing- Always thinking that the worst is gonna happen.

7. Labeling- Telling yourself u r on idiot or a loser based on perceived ideas.

8. Should is & should nots- Holding yourself to an impossible list, & beating
yourself up, when u do not adhere to it.

9. The mental filter- When u forget about all the good things, & only focus on the
bad things that have happened.

10. Overgeneralization- Expecting one negative experience to always remain true.

5. RELAX- The most important thing u have to do is learn to relax. You can try deep breathing & meditation. Take time for yourself, no matter how difficult it may be. Remember to think good thoughts whenever a negative thought rears it is ugly head. This will train ur brain to think of things in a more positive light. A good relaxation tip for me is to listen to soothing music without any distractions. Just an hour can work wonders on a tired, emotionally drained body & mind.

It is not easy to change ur way of thinking, but it can be done. After a while u will see many new & exciting doors open up. Please remember That You Deserve To Have A Happy Life.

Just Relax. Everything is going to be OK. l understand that you miss your mom but like you said she deserves the trip. If are afraid of something bad happening, just call her and see if everything is going as planned. If your mom knows how you are than she wo not mind if you keep calling her from time to time. But for now, try doing something that will take your mind off of the situation. Like, watching a funny chris tucker movie, and eating some strawberry ice cream. Good Luck.

last week something upset me & any little thing could set me off.

l have some tips to stop crying:
1. run ur tongue along the top of ur mouth
2. do math problems (easy ones) in head. It works ur left brain, while emotions r formed in the right
3. deep breathing- it really helps!
4. invite a friend to talk to
5. invite a friend to cheer u up. tell them u need a hug! Feeling the heartbeat of another human is soothing
6. bite ur tongue/pinch yourself as a distraction (not super hard)
7. roll/cross ur eyes to top tears
8. write down what is bothering u (i guess u just did) but also how it makes u feel, getting it all out will help calm you
9. watch tv, read a book, cook something, find some distraction
10. make a list of the good things in this situation. u said she deserves it, & it will help u grow. anything else?

to make yourself feel better l suggest a bubble bath & ice cream! whatever cheers u up, do it to get ur mind off this. u have the whole house to yourself! talking to someone seriously helps

whatever u do: do not call ur mom. she just left & it will just make u more upset if u call now. wait a day or two until ur both use to it.

l was like this a few weeks ago. l have been going through so much lately. l took off a week from work and just had to drain out my self. your mom will be happy but what you have to do is not have to have her worry about you. let her know your going to be fine. l hope you feel better soon. take care

If u already have a therapist u should consider contacting them. You allude to ur life being ''messed up'' & suffering from borderline, l assume u mean Bipolar Disorder? If u r bipolar & the medication is not controlling the problem then the dosage probably needs adjustment which makes it imperative to contact ur doctor or therapist soon.
Let is turn logically to ur fears: 1) Pirates of the Caribbean. great movie but not a realistic problem. Most modern day pirates r located off the coast of Africa & the Caribbean is patrolled by the U.S. Coast Guard from the air, sea, & by satellite. The state of Florida has numerous USCG Cutters, helicopters & C-130 aircraft that make pirates a non issue. Here r a list of USCG Air Stations that monitor that area: Seventh District
CGAS Clearwater, Florida
CGAS Miami, Florida
CGAS Savannah, Georgia
CGAS Borinquen, Aguadilla, Puerto Rico In the Seventh District their r 18 USCG stations from Charleston, SC southward that cover the Atlantic & Caribbean. So she is safe there.
Storms- l have lived in Florida (Tampa Bay) for 25+ years & we r at the end of hurricane season. The water temps r dropping which removes the fuel for any storms. Our hurricane busy season passed a couple of weeks ago. The crews onboard ships keep an eye out for their passengers & l do not think ur Mom is naive so give her more credit than getting drugged by some devious character.
You really need to contact a friend or ur therapist/primary care doctor as ur thoughts r spinning out of control. Do u have any siblings or relatives u could stay with until Mom returns? As to moving out of Mom is personally it does not sound as if that would be in ur best interest until ur medication gets ur problems to a more manageable level. You will be fine. Mom will be fine. Call someone soon & discuss it with them as u need help from someone who knows ur history & can give u advice to help u get grounded again. l know these fears r real to u but they seem extreme to an outsider like me. l wish u the best & can only try to reassure u that ur fears r unfounded & no harm is going to come to ur Mom on a cruise ship with many people with whom she will probably make several friends & is fine for the 9 days. Get someone on the phone right away as u just need contact with someone familiar to reassure u that all is going to be well.

BPD is the most difficult to treat mental illness because it is a character & enviormental based illness not a brain or chemical based illness. That is there is a certain amount of choice in the person to behave the way the they do. l am sure that none of what u r going through is new to you. BPD is have very intense enmeshed relationships but the reality is no one can meet ur expectations & u r abandoned & ur relationships fail.

You need to continue to take ur medications & try to convince yourself that ur fears r irrational. If u have a counselor or therapist, make an appointment. Try not to escalate to the use of crisis line or center (that should be a short term goal) You also need to find something to do in ur spare time, some sort of physical activity. Until then use the coping mechanisms u have. Most BPD is grow out the disorder around the age of 40.

Okay so u have a lot of problems. This clearly runs deeper than ur mom is cruise. l have a friend with BPD & dependency is not a part of hers but whatever, l guess that is something u have trouble with too.

l know l am gonna get some thumbs downs for this, but u seriously need to go to a doctor, not . Here people will only tell u what they would do in this situation etc, etc, but l am pretty sure this is not the first time u have not been able to stop crying.

seriously; see a doctor or a therapist (even a cheap one. At least it is someone REAL to talk to)

You live in Houston. That is why. But really, figure out what is making you cry. Maybe you're just lonely and depressed. Or maybe you're just used to being around your mother. Maybe you should find something to keep you occupied.